Response to Sleepless in Florida

Dear Marriage Warrior,

My teenage daughter Gracie's always been a good girl, so when she told me she was bringing a guy home, I wasn't remotely concerned. I trust her not to lay in a sinful manner until her wedding night, and I trust her not to date those ungodly chess club members.

Then she told me he's also got brown hair.

Gracie says that having the same hair color doesn't matter to them; that our Church's stance on same-hair dating is old fashioned and based on bigotry. I told her we're not bigoted against girls who date boys based on hair color; indeed, we love them. But it is still a sin.

Gracie is not talking to me, but that's not the most upsetting thing. As we were talking loudly to one another, she asked me a question I couldn't answer:

"But Mom, WHY is it a sin?"

I realized I couldn't answer, and she won't talk to me until I do.

So Marriage Warrior, please, tell me: Why is it a sin?

Sincerely,

Sleepless in Florida

Dear Sleepless in Florida:

Here's what you need to do: You need to go to your little girl's room now, take her hands, and lead her into prayer.

Then tell her that Same-Hair Marriage is unnatural. It is universally known that Adam had black hair, and Eve had brown hair.

Do not let her be corrupted by America's communist society; she must realize that there is only one true way. The Way.

I will pray for you and your daughter.

In God,

Marriage Warrior